Ahmedabad: Childless Indian couples are more comfortable with the idea of taking help from within the family. This is why Neil and Nandini, three-year-olds who live in the US, could grow up to tell their peers a story straight out of sci-fi books.

They came to life in a petri dish; their birth mother is their grandmother Radha. The 48-year-old agreed to help her daughter four years ago because her marriage was falling apart over her barrenness. Arti did not have a uterus and her husband wanted a child that was genetically their own. Radha’s help meant they now do.

Doctors say much has changed in the past decade.

IVF expert Dr Falguni Bavishi says, “Families are more forthcoming today when it comes to helping a childless family member. A decade ago, most people would go for unknown donors and have a tough time finding an anonymous surrogate mother. Now, nearly 50 per cent egg donors and 25 per cent surrogates are close family members”.

So it was with Amrut Patel, a 36-year-old primary school teacher in Wadhwan, Saurashtra and his 32-yearold wife Veena. They had been trying for a child for 10 years and finally decided to turn to Veena’s cousin Kiran. “We are sure that good traits will be passed on in our child. More than the skin colour, we are bothered about the nature and sanskaar or culture of the donor. With Kiran, we are sure of both,” she says.

The sentiment is echoed by Ritika, a New Zealandbased Gujarati, who recently gave birth to twins using eggs donated by her brother’s wife. The young woman says genes were the deciding factor when it came to choosing between a family member and a stranger donor.

But does she never think — and agonise over — the fact that her sons’ genetic parents are her husband and sisterin-law? “I have delivered the sons, I am the mother. This thought never crosses my mind,” she says.

Not everyone is so sanguine. “One of every three or four couples does ask for anonymous donors as they do not want the possible emotional conflict of having a child who is genetically linked to a close family member,” admits Bavishi. But for the most part, IVF, egg and sperm donation and surrogacy seem to stay well within the great Indian family.